sorry dearr :(

have just had dinner and gai-gai with him :D
everything seemed alright ..
except last night's incident ..
haiiks ..
feel so sad to remember :(

i can't bear to see him sad .
especially if that was because of me .
regret . remorseful . sad .

how could i intentionally don't pick up his calls while he was full of anxiety that time .
afraid that he would hurt my feelings .
in fact , i was the one who was bad .
i was the one who hurt him .

after picking up the call , i immediately blamed myself for being that bad !!
i should have answered the first call :(
i could feel that he was very anxious , and even very sad .

have forgiven you .
you know i can't stay mad at you for too long :)

yeahh , had a great time just now .
although i am afraid of something now :|
hmmp . hope that everything will be okay .
may GOD bless us always :)

"it doesn't matter where you go . what matters is with whom you spend your time"

范瑋琪 - I Think I Love You

一天过一天
从不确定变成了答案
就像这样
停留在只有你去的方向

每当你出现我身旁
就感觉爱情的重量
我越在意越难衡量 就越放不下
越不去想就越是他

I think I love you 爱就是这样
cause I miss you 喜欢你善良
陪你去逛逛 会偶尔吵架
吵累了说贴心的话

I'm falling for you 爱就是这样
now I need you 想等你放假
要一起分享 oh 今晚的星光
当你说要守护幸福 不打烊

我们越看就越像
不说也能了解对方
画同一张图画 想同一个梦想
幸福是一座大灯塔

少了你世界就照不亮
你一定会再给我力量
其实爱我并不复杂 真心的对话
就能够往幸福出发

爱时常让两个人受伤
爱也总让两个人更坚强 oh yeah
我们不会知道 以后的日子会有多长
在我的世界 都会有你守护肩膀

look at the bright side :D

tiredd after having fun ( was i ? ) a whole day ..
hmmp . it was supposed to be a good dayy ..
but my mood was ruined . hikks .

it was problem between us .
problem which we never intend to solve .
is it because you are tired ? getting bored ?
or is it my fault ?
if yes , i'm so sorry .

heartache-ing mode on :|

yeahh , as there were bad things , there would be also good things .
i might have some problems with him , but my dears cheered me up
we went for photobox and took some crazy pics there :)

and although i have been hanging out since morning till drop , mommie and daddie didn't mention a single word about it :)
at first , i thought that i would be hearing my mom's old song , but i didn't . hahaha XD

well , both good and bad things always happen on us .
remember to look at the bright side .
everything will be okay .
believe in yourself that you can overcome it .
with GOD's help , problem is no longer a problem :)

cheers :D

陈伟联 - 分手的情書

聚要吃苦　散要受苦　就看誰更頑固

我聞到你哭　那種溫度
寒心得像撫摸　愛的墳墓
想到感情歸宿　忘了人情世故
別為仁慈　製造殘酷

眼前無路　心中有數　何必繼續漫步
你該擁有更輕易的幸福
談戀愛不是追逐難度

愛如苗圃命如蠟燭　沿路燒到光禿
是我自私放不下同甘共苦
也念不出分手的情書

愛值得付出　也能退出
來時聚成露珠　去若晨霧
感情美得虛無　就當作身外物
不要讓它　變成包袱

我本來是孤獨的壁虎
你生來是掌上明珠

眼前無路　心中有數　何必繼續漫步
你該擁有更輕易的幸福
別為我粉身碎骨　你看

你的付出該換來更大滿足
如果是這樣　不如不如

p.s. have been listening to this lately .
so touching :|

@$%@??

it has been a long time since i was here last time . hoho .
got no time for blogging and a little bit lazy XD
hahahah .

anywayy , life isn't going on well recently .
got unfinished-tasks , tests and other works .
even got myself into slight fever and headache :((

few days ago , got some problems with DSF .
haiiks . somehow , it isn't like what it used to be anymore and it isn't going to be the same either .
i guess i'll have to get used to it >,<

if they think that with him around then they are unimportant , they are totally wrong .
i just want to maintain a balance between love and friendship .
thought n planned to find our memories back and what i've got in return was ... .
hmmph . i even don't know how to say .
maybe it is just not like what it USED TO BE .
things might change .
things might be different .
but how much i wish our friendship won't .

used to gai-gai together .
used to shop together .
used to hang out together .
used to understand one another feelings .
used to do things together .
used to so close with one another .
without keeping distance between one another .
without any gaps between us .
but now it were only left 'USED TO BE-S' .

feel so sad that she's misunderstood my idea .
how could she think that way ?
sigh*

i was neglected . hiiks .
am i okay , like what i've been saying to others lately ?
no , i am definitely not .
i don't like this kind of feeling . haiish .
i know i am selfish , i am not understanding at all .
but it feels so hard when you want to talk to him while he has no time to hear you .
yeahh , not that he wants it , that's why i am saying that i am selfish :((

i am tired , really . am i taking things too hard ?
i think life still goes on well , even there is no 'me' .
yeahh , so unimportant i am >,<

"the only thing that will never change is change"

♥ you

have just had dinner with him and his family .
somehow , feel glad that ( maybe ) i am treated as one of them .
they seemed welcome me warmly .
but on the other side , i feel so sorry that my family can't treat him like how his family treat me .
i do bother about this kind of stuff and have been thinking how to get them closer .
maybe time will help me , although i don't know how long i have to wait .
sigh*

i am glad that i realized the importance of my existence now , before it is too late .
not that i think highly of myself , but i trust him .
moreover , i trust myself . i am just being confident :D

it was proven that that time i visited him .
he was ill and because of some reasons , he was so down and resentful .
at first when i saw him , i was so shocked that he was pale .
then he told me what happened and we talked a lot .
i've tried ways to cheer him up and it worked XD .
i am so happy to know that i am quite important to him .
he was so different when i saw him at first .
he looked more energetic and happier :))
i never thought that i can do that .

at the beginning till now , we have been through so many tests .
but we never gave up each other .
yesterday we didn't , now we don't and hopefully in the future , we still won't give up :D

as long as we care each other .
as long as we trust each other .
as long as we are patient .
as long as we are unite .
as long as we don't give up .
as long as we tolerate .
nothing can stop us for our happiness ahead :D

♥ you

- "to the world , you may be just one person
but to one person , you may be the world" -
:)

OUR BIRTHDAY XD

last night was BELOVED DSF's bdae wohh .

a year past so fast . last 7th July , we were celebrating it at agro resort .
but this year could not , due to the limited time . hiiks .
but of course , it was still fun . all of the members were there .

we went to pizza hut , then cinema box to watch the 'eclipse' and finally went to vian's house to have OUR BIRTHDAY CAKE :D

actually things were quite complicated when suddenly somebody ( i forgot who ) suggested to celebrate it on 7th July because it was a day before . jie was in batam and he had to get permission from his mother and sister , because he had classes and he is going to have exam soon .
we planned to celebrate it again at agro on the 17th July , but didn't know why they suddenly changed their mind . so , everything was prepared in a rush .
at first , we had thought many ideas for the dress code , but in the end , we all wore so simple , especially me . hahahha :pp

the most troublesome was that when it came to the time we arranged to gather around ( 1 p.m ) , it rained heavily .
the car that i usually drive broke down and we don't have any vehicle . it turned out that jie rented a car and because he just arrived and immediately rushed to fetch the others ( i was helping my mom for a while ) , he didn't had a bath after walking home in rain . it caused him having fever now . hiiks . so worried . hope he will get well soon .
safely , we got to pizza hut and had our sumptous meal there . yummy . hahaha :))
took some photos and went to cinema box .

we were late for a while and the seats were not that comfortable . the seat positions are : phine & wong , vian & erwin , vone & renny , jie & xil . when we came out , every of us complained that the sofa tortured every part of our body . ckckss .
then we set off to vian's house and crazy-ing there . wkk :)
of course , on the way , in the car , we were accompanied by the DJ-s of 123 FM . hahaha . they are ivone , renny and vian . hahaha . those are the most cheerful among us :D
many many thumbs up for their jokes and their powerful voices . hahaha XD
we received souvenirs from phine who had just came back from jakarta : cute pins .

the good news is : she is going to stay for a month or more . cihhuuuuyyyyy XD
the celebration ended up by jie sending them one by one to home , except renny who was being fetched by her mom earlier .

but i found myself was weird last night . felt like not in the mood .
maybe because of troubles recently . hmmp .
and i hurt somebody last night . i didn't mean it .
i'm so sorry . hiiks :'( feel so regret . haiish .

what i want to know is , readers , how would and how should we feel when both good thing and bad thing come at once ? happy or sad ?
i was so confused . i thought i ought to have been happy , but in fact i couldn't .
i wonder what if others were in my shoes , what would they do ?
hmmp :(

anyway , things were quite good todayy .
still hoping tomorrow will always better than today :)